A Smashing Birthday

Happy First Birthday sweet little bean!
We celebrated with a cake smash tonight.
Definitely not a professional shoot, but fun nonetheless...

My life is so much richer and every day is sweeter, because of you.
All my love,
Mama

Sunday Shots

We took a walk along one of the beachy towns yesterday and
yeah Joe snapped one of the rare shots proving that Charlie has a Mama!

The bean is loving his new view in the forward facing car seat.

(Yes we switched it two days early, bad parents that we are).

What happens when you drive around town with the windows down,

the poor bean has his Mama's hair!

Birthday Cake Shots :o)

Weekend Highs and Lows

Charlie's birthday party went as beautifully as it could have. Everyone loved the food and treats, we played games, laughed and made memories that will make me smile for a long time to come. Charlie was happy all day and had a great time with his grandparents, aunts & uncles and cousins. The weather couldn't have been more perfect either, 85 degrees in late April?!

Tonight was a tough night though. Sometimes it feels as though when we have a great day I have to pay penance for it with a difficult one. Joe and I had a stupid argument in the morning while Charlie was asleep, but then Charlie had an off day. We took him out to lunch with us at a local sandwich shop and I gave him some of my ham sandwich along with the lunch I had made for him. He seemed to really enjoy it.

During his second nap I made blueberry muffins for him in another attempt to find a way to get fruits into his system. I know this isn't the healthiest option, but my bean is so picky with his foods that I am desperate to find anything that he will eat more than a couple times.

Once he woke up we were off to run more errands and take a walk since the weather was again an incredible 85 degrees.

Dinner time came around and Charlie had been fussing for a while at this point. As we were just finishing up Charlie's dinner he started to volently projectile vomit. Everything came up including undigested food from his lunch, more than 5 hours earlier. This violent vomiting has been a more frequent occurence for us lately. It's so awful to see him cry and be in pain. I took him into the bath to try and calm him down. He is such a strong little boy because he wa smiling in no time. My heart breaks though to see him in pain and still having these issues.

I feel so lost at times. I just don't understand why this has to be so difficult. I know God is working on Charlie and I but I just wish I knew what was in his plan. I wish I could take the pain away or at least take Charlie's place so he didn't have to suffer. I guess this is every mother's wish, though.

Tomorrow I'm calling the doctor because lately I've been far too meek in that department, not wanting to bother anyone or seem overly neurotic. I have to help my sweet boy and try to understand the cause for all of this- whether it's reflux or other food allergies I need to make it better.

Oh and the icing on the cake for the night-Our buyers pulled out of the house after having it inspected. They found we have termite damage that we now have to address and fix immediately. I don't blame them for pulling out, I just wish we knew about the issue sooner. Again I must remind myself, God has a plan for us, it will all work out.

Poundage...

That's what I'll be packing on if I continue on my sweet treat kick.
These lovelies are cake balls.

Here's the recipe if you're interested.

And unlike the super rich Oreo truffles, you can't eat just one of these.

Saturday needs to come a little faster!

Thank you Bakerella!

Look what I made tonight...

Oreo truffles ala Bakerella.

These are my favors for the adults invited to Charlie's birthday party (this Saturday)!

Because, as far as I'm concerned, the kids shouldn't have all the fun.

Absolutely decadent and a lot of fun to make.
I'm putting them in cute little Chinese take-out containers.
But for now they are hanging out in my freezer.

Hmm, now what to do with the left over divine white chocolate... ;o)

I can't believe it...

Less than a week and a half until my little bean turns one. So many emotions: My heart hurts a little because time is moving too quickly. Joy from the little man that makes me smile and laugh so much every day. And a teeny bit of pride from the fact that we have survived! We haven't broken him yet ha, ha.

In other news, the reason I haven't had time to post lately is because we have been crazed in house planning/selling/buying. We have a bindered offer on our house after listing it for only three weeks. How lucky are we? I am praying that the young couple buying our home will have no issues securing a mortgage. Beyond that, I hope they are as blessed by our home as we were.

I've been spending a ton of time narrowing down paint colors for our new-old house. The one thing I am confident about- Charlie's room. We are doing a whole coastal theme with creamy white beadboard halfway up the wall. Then Ralph Lauren has this really cool nautical map wallpaper that we are putting above the beadboard. Here's a look at it:
I must say that I am feeling incredibly blessed right now, in more ways than I can articulate. I prayed for Charlie's reflux to improve, our family to find a home on a quiet street, for a nice couple to buy our house and God answered every one of my prayers.

I'll be honest, in some ways I don't feel completely derserving of all these blessings. Each night I have asked God to help make me a better mother, wife, daughter, sister and friend. And each day I strive to be just that, whether it's being a little more compassionate, more patient (I could work on this more!) a better listener. Just like the new-old house we are buying, I am a work in progress :o)

Oh me, oh my...

Short post because I'm off to bed but had to share....

Charlie took his first steps tonight! He walked sideways from one corner of the couch to the other, about five steps in total. I couldn't believe my eyes.

It makes me want to cry thinking about it now. Lord, I'm such an emotional basketcase. I don't think the pregnancy hormones ever fully exited my bloodstream- or at least that's my excuse!

Easter- a little late

We had a very busy Easter buzzing between my family a Joe's.
One of the highlights was seeing Charlie in action with an Elmo walker that my sister let us borrow. Now all charlie wants to do is walk-run around the house from corner to corner.

He was so proud of himself, but so was Mama.

And my sister was also able to snap a new family pic- thanks Kris!

My bean is not a fan of the swing...

But he sure loves ducks!

The weekend in pictures...

Had to be out of the house most of the weekend for multiple showings. Luckily we had plenty to do.

We had an Easter egg hunt at a friend's house

And today was such beautiful weather we went to the beach and had some fun on the swings:

Joe captured one of my favorite shots of Charlie and I.

Can you tell which one of us has the other wrapped around their pudgy, delicious finger?
Hmmm ;O)

Whirlwind week

Having a house on the market makes for a bad blogger. Today alone was absolutely insane. We had a brokers open house and three appointments for walk-throughs. Charlie and I were out of the house from 9am-6pm! So exhausting.

When Charlie's napping I'm cleaning, when he's sleeping I'm cleaning and when he's awake I'm cleaning. I've mastered the art of holding a 25ish lb baby and vacuuming. The silver lining-I've lost 7 lb pounds in two weeks and my arms are the most toned they have ever been in my life!

I am praying our house sells soon because I don't feel like we can really 'live' in it anymore. I practically follow Charlie around with the dust buster in tow. Forgive me while I run off to my bed to lose myself in a silly romance novel, because this Mama needs a break!

Next time I'll be posting my monthly update and where we are in birthday preparations. T minus 26 days to go, Ahhh!

Happy 11 month Bday Little Bean!

A couple of shots from our day...

Funny the tv wasn't on, but his expression looks differently!

I have altogether given up on getting the 'sitting in chair' shot.
-those days are long gone...

That's my baby :o)

Spring Cleaning

It's been a little crazy over here at the homestead between house inspections, putting our house on the market, cleaning and decluttering, sprucing up the inside and outside wherever we can and oh yeah taking care of the bean too.

And I am seriously missing my play yard/baby prison/safe containment. It basically took up our whole living room- not so appealing to people who are looking to see how spacious the rooms are. On the positive side, I will probably shed some poundage chasing Charlie up and down the hallway!

All fun exciting things though. Last night I lay restless in bed for hours, full of happy energy because I'm so excited for this new change and direction in our life. Needless to say I am sooo tired tonight because I barely slept- so off to dreamland I go *hopefully*!

Down for the count again

Last night at about midnight I started to feel a little off. I was restless all night, getting up every hour on the hour from pains in my stomach. At first I didn't know if it was anxiety from Charlie having such an awful going-to-bed experience, (he threw up twice and cried for an hour +) but then all day today I could barely do anything.

I slept when Charlie napped and hobbled along, gripping my stomach when I had to get up. Thank God Joe helped me so much today with Charlie. I'm starting to feel a little better now, thank the Lord. Now I'm just praying the bean and Joe will not succumb to this awful bug.

Feeling more in control

Thanks to everyone for their compassion and encouraging words. I had a good cleansing cry the other night after Charlie fought going to bed to the point of projectile vomiting everywhere. That's a new problem I need to address- trying to get him to go down on his own without getting so upset that he chokes and then throws up. But we'll get there...

Yesterday was a MUCH better day and today I have a more relaxed and calm attitude. I'm lucky to have friends and family that support me so often. Being a mother is harder than I ever imagined it could be, but when Charlie is asleep at night I miss him and look forward to the adventures the next day has in store for us.

In other news, we have an accepted offer on that house I had mentioned before. I'm holding my breath until the inspection (more likely until closing day when everything is signed), but I really think this house could be our forever home. It needs soooo much work (new kitchen, baths, paint, roof, windows) but we can do it all on our own time schedule.

It's a colonial on a nice a quiet road with plenty of land for Charlie to run around and for me to garden to my heart's content. Joe and I can turn that old kitchen around and breath new life into it, I'm sure. And there is enough room to invite our family and friends over for get-togethers. I can't wait. I'm looking at paint colors, dreaming up Charlie's room (I think we're going to go for a nautical beachy theme for his room and the whole house.) I'll leave you with a few shots from our first kitchen and bath reno...

BeforeAfter

Before

After

Worried

Several months back I mentioned an issue Charlie was having with his eyes, a condition called exotropia, where one eye drifts outward. Well I had noticed his eyes were doing it more recently. The problem only manifests when he is lethargic or just waking up.

When I first noticed the problem he was able to 'reset,' as I called it, almost instantaneously. Recently I've noticed it has taken him longer for his eyes to become symmetrical when he is waking up. Yesterday we went back to the specialist so she could have a look at him again and she was able to catch his subtle drift with one of her eye tests.

My job is to monitor it for the next 4 months, see if it worsens, or see if one eye is worse than the other. I wish there was something I could do now, some sort of action other than observing him.

Should his eyes worsen, there is a spectrum of different solutions from wearing a patch to surgery to strengthen the eye muscles-- but all of it makes my stomach hurt to be honest.

Beyond the eye issues, today I am not feeling like a great Mommy. When I was at my sister Danielle's last night she noted that Charlie wasn't holding his own bottles (I was feeding him his bedtime bottle at the time) and how her children all were holding their bottles by this point. She wasn't being judgemental in any way, shape or form- just making an observation.

But out creeps that little monster I try to keep hidden- self doubt. I tried to given Charlie his formula in a sippy cup this morning and he just wouldn't have it, he freaked and wanted it the way he always has it. I will have to keep trying, but first I have to shake this shadow hanging over me. Lord do I wish there was a handbook that came attached to the bean, because sometimes I feel so completely lost.

Happy St. Patty's!

We had a yummy Irish feast at my sister's house tonight and Charlie had a blast with all his cousins. We also got the chance to see the space station flying by in it's orbit over the house, a pretty fun night if I do say so.

Oh and can someone tell me why my pictures are loading up with huge white borders? I have no idea what I'm doing wrong here...

Yowza

It's been a crazy week over here and I've had barely any time to catch my breath. Still going back and forth on that house we made a bid on, but I could make a post out of that story alone.

Tuesday night I had a book club get together with some other lovely Mommy friends of mine. Around ten pm Joe called me and I heard Charlie wailing in the background- not good.

Poor guy ended up having yet another ear infection. And now I'm thinking the new meds they gave me are aggravating his reflux. Ugh.

Yesterday was one of "those" days. Joe had to fly out last minute to California for work in the midst of me going to the doctor with a very unhappy baby. I am such a wus when it comes to my husband being out of town. I become one huge emotional stressball. Thank God my Mom came down and saved the day, she helped me immensely, in ways I cannot express. Thank you Mom :o)

I was trying to rush through Stop & Shop to pick up Charlie's antibiotics and get home to say goodbye to Joe (so he could make it to the airport on time) . It was a comedy of errors. Huge lines in the middle of the day, they had my insurance info all messed up so it took a half hour longer than the 20 mins it usually takes, everyone was moving as slow as molasses. I could feel my blood pressure rising...

Tonight my bean was fit to be tied. He cried for nearly two hours. I tried all the tricks and then I gave him maalox and he fell asleep in my arms. Needless to say my first call of the morning will be to my pedi about those meds.

I'd like to end on a few positive notes:
next week is SPRING, thank the Lord!
My little guy has the brightest smiles when he wakes up from his naps
I can't wait for Saturday to see my dear Joe. I am so blessed to be married to such a wonderful supportive helpful husband who is as smitten with our little boy as I am.
Saturday Joe and I are celebrating our five year anniversary and it just keeps getting better.
I'm a lucky girl...

The bean's first haircut!

and Mama got all misty-eyed...

Before

During (he didn't cry until the end)

After!

Playing with grandpa