Bad Blogger!

I've been awful lately with zero entries. Trying to paint, finish to dos around the house, spring clean and plan a birthday party have absorbed all my free time.

Oh, and we came down with Coxsackie (our whole house) and that took quite a while to recover from. Charlie was up screaming at night and had blisters everywhere: hands, feet, tongue, throat. As a result we are now all thrown off for our napping and sleeping and Charlie was up for three hours last night and refused to nap today (and the past few days). I'm praying that if I get him to bed very early tonight that he will sleep through and then I will be able to catch up a bit too. Here's a shot of a sick Charlie snuggling with Owen:

And yesterday the birthday 2nd birthday!

Charlie enjoyed himself thoroughly and blew out the candle like a big boy. I'm going to create another post just to detail what we did on his birthday but thought while I had a moment to pop in a few shots, I would.

photo montage

cheeeese!

silly eyes

big grins

eyelashes

green bean

saying grace

teeth!

the comedian :o)

Weekend in Review

I never gave a recap on Easter so here it is- We had a phenomenal day! I did a ton of prep on Saturday and as a result we were able to go to church together and then come home and get the monstrous ham in the oven. Having an organized plan really helped save me form being a major worry-wort. The ham and stuffed shells came out great and all the side dishes my sisters and mom made were absolutely delicious. We had way too much food from appetizers to dessert but that's the way it always is with our family.

The kids had fun with our little egg hunt and played outside enjoying the beautiful sunny weather. It was so nice to host everyone and I had so much help cleaning up that the house was in pretty good shape when everyone left to go home.

Here's a shot of my bean before church, it was a quick shot and his eyes are half open but we were in a rush.

One thing I do regret is not getting a family picture. Joe and I are so awful at getting pictures together, it's pretty bad. I need to work on that before the next big birthday arrives in a little more than two weeks!

This past weekend we were blessed again with gorgeous weather and Charlie had his first soccer class. It was so cute, he and his buddies had a great time and the instructor was a lot of fun and really patient.

After soccer Joe took a load of tree branches and roots to the dump and then we took a long, sunny walk together. We also made it to the beach and Charlie played in the sand, on the slide, fed the seagulls and explored.

Sunday we went to church in the morning and then spent most of the day outside working on the yard. I actually had my hand at the backhoe and dug up some tree stumps- it was fun playing the the big boy toys! All in all it was as perfect a weekend as it could have been because we spent it together as a family in the warm sunshine :o)

Little man

You are the light of my life :o)

Thank you for making every day a new fun adventure :o) Love Mama

Easter Prep

This Sunday I will be hosting for Easter. It is the first time we are hosting a holiday and I can't wait :o) I started working of the table settings this afternoon, I still have some work to do with the linens (and on Sunday I will add dyed eggs to the egg cups), but here is a little glimpse at what I'm working on:

Were hosting about 17 for dinner and 22ish for dessert, hence the second table (and our kitchen table will be used too!)

We are going to have an egg hunt in the front yard and I have some fun craft projects for the kids planned too. I also made place cards for the kids with trivia Q&A on them.

I can't wait to see Charlie soak everything in. He is speaking in sentences now and has started calling Joe and I Mommy and Daddy which is so precious. Tonight he said Nigh-night Daddy, Nigh-night Mommy when we were putting him to bed. And in the morning he just wants to cuddle in bed with us. I am in love with this stage and my sweet, mushy boy :o)

Bathroom Paint Job

Yesterday afternoon I hired a babysitter to watch Charlie so I could paint the bathroom. I am so happy with the color that some of you gave me feedback on (BM Pale Smoke), so thank you! It's the perfect shade of grey-blue that brings out the marble and the cabinetry; such a soothing color.

Here's a shot of the mini-hallway in our bedroom with the new paint color I put up this morning, Wedgewood Grey (also BM).

Now we just have to paint the trim, put up the vanity lights and we are almost there. Then Charlie's bathroom needs painting and vanity lights too.

When the lights go out in the city...

We survived the major Noreaster but with no power for five days!
I'll be posting on that separately today as it was a big adventure.
Here's a shot of one part of our neighborhood
to give you an idea of the severity of the storm:

And here's a quick bathroom photo update.
Not too much has changed but we've had lots of bad weather and cancellations.
We'll get there...

Radio Silence

Our computer pretty much exploded about two weeks ago so if anyone has been wondering why there have been no posts, there you have it. We are getting closer to finished with the bathroom renovations and I can't wait to post some new pictures but still have to upload my camera software.

We are also having central air installed (so exciting!) and the landscaping projects are going to start up again since we are having some amazing 50 degree weather. My friends made fun of me for busting out my flip flops yesterday, but I am euphoric about the arrival of spring this year.

Charlie is bustling about and saying some two words sentences. His vocabulary is amazing now and it is so much easier to communicate. That being said we still have our disagreements when his priorities don't align with mine :o) I've been reading up a lot on the terrible twos and am convinced we are doing a pretty good job all around. But check back with me tomorrow, that could change!

Basketweave Tile

Still needs to be grouted, but one step closer...

Our living room is livable now that we moved the furniture back in. At some point, many moons from today, I will have an opportunity to pain the wood furniture a beachy white so everything can match. Maybe that can be a summer project. We also need a small coffee table (that you can put drinks on) for our sectional. It definitely feels warmer and more cozy in there now.

Grout and Bound Carpet

Grouted tile!!

The wait is over. After 2 months, backorders, and a torn carpet that forced us to live without a living room for a week the carpet man came today with my bound rug :o)

Before:

After:

Charlie isn't the only one jumping for joy.

The coloring is a bit off in these shots but you get the idea :o)
This is the cleanest either will ever be, but that's the way my beautiful life is with the little bean.

Paint Color Question

Here are some updated shots from today.
We have a vanity and medicine cabinet installed :o)

The vanities in the master were installed also, I just don't have a decent shot to share.
A different look at the tub with a better view of the tile and chair rail.

And here's my question if anyone would like to share their thoughts. Below is a paint chip with two colors. One the left is the more green blue BM Woodlawn Blue. On the right is a more grey blue, BM Pale Smoke. Which one do you think would look better with the carrera? Am I splitting hairs here, lol?! You can click on the picture to make it larger, not sure if that helps at all though! I won't say which I'm leaning towards just yet...

Finally I had to share this picture of the bean reading in his room :o)

Bathrooms- We're getting there!

Here are a couple shots from Charlie's bath. Beadboard almost complete.
Door has been hung.
Tomorrow if everything goes as planned the cabinetry will be installed
and we can put the toilet in permanently- oh joy of joys!

Here's the status on the master:
Carrera tile installed, 'backsplash' for the soaker tub with chair rail installed.

Next up will be the shower stall and the carpenter will work on wainscoting (paneling) on the walls and tub deck.

It feels as though things are falling into place :o)

State of my Union

Last week after the President gave his speech, Joe and I had a chat in bed about wishes and goals for our family in the future. It's no secret that Joe has wanted to add to our family, he was ready to start when Charlie was six months old. And everyday we're finding out more and more of our friends are pregnant with their second and third little ones. I think I stopped counting after 12!

But here we are, quickly approaching Charlie's second birthday and I still do not feel in any way ready to have another baby.

I think there are multiple reasons for my hesitation.

The first is that my son is an extremely demanding child when it is just him and myself. I know every toddler is high energy, prone to meltdowns etc. But Charlie wakes up every morning, and consequently from each nap, screaming and shrieking as though someone is trying to murder him. This is how we start every day. I have many friends who say their babies can quietly and happily play in their crib. Honestly, it takes anywhere from 15-30 minutes for my son to calm down from once he has woken up.

It wasn't until recently that we started getting good quality sleep in our house despite my efforts at sleep training with several methods.

The severity of his reflux/colic and allergies in his infancy (up to about 14 months) have worn off but the emotional scars are still very present for me. The screaming for hours, constant projectile vomiting, hunger strikes and refusal to eat really wore me down. I felt completely lost and incompetent as a mother.

Our breastfeeding failure (and my complete desperation to make it work) left me feeling extremely depressed and like less of a mother.

When Charlie gets ill it takes him twice as long as the normal toddler to recover. I've seen this time and time again with all of our baby-friends. Today was the first good day we had since he came down with the stomach bug on Monday. His gastroenterologist termed him a "easy vomiter" so certain textures of foods or even coughing too hard can cause him to completely empty his stomach.

For a long time when we were trying to work on our sleep schedule he would vomit one or more times at bedtime (and sometimes at naps too) and we would have to change the sheets, him, clean the floors. It has been so emotionally exhausting to try and fill him with healthy well balanced foods to see everything come right back up again.

He does not have much of a threshold for pain (I think this comes back to the reflux) so whenever he was teething we just could not sleep.

I'm not going to drag through all the other reasons and details but I think the crux of the matter is that with all our trials I have ended up doubting myself and at times I still do not feel confident about my abilities.

I am fearful that then next child will end up having one or more of the problems Charlie had. I don't know where I would find the time to give enough attention, enough of myself, to both children. Would there be anything left after that?

I know many other mothers have suffered far worse than I have. I'm not trying to complain, really just state what is going on inside of my head and heart. I pray each night and morning and ask God to make me a better mother to my son. Charlie is such a source of complete joy and love for me.

Joe and I came out of our discussion feeling better for having communicated and hopefully, come the spring, God will have worked on my heart some more and I will be ready to take that next step. I think when the time comes I may have to just close my eyes and leap with blind faith.

To close on a happy note, I'm ending this post with a funny picture :o)

21 months

When did my baby become a little man?

Charlie your vocabulary is exploding; today you must have said ten new words.
You know a couple letters and your favorite number is 2.
You love to have your blankie flipped over your face and sometimes you will still play peek-a-boo with it.
You adore animals and like to make animal noises. Favorites are frog, snake, lion & cat
You'd love to hug and kiss every animal you come across. Owen seems to love your affection:o)
You try to make everyone (even strangers) laugh with silly faces and noises.
You're a dancing machine and ask to dance every day in the living room.
You still have that gentle, loving, helpful little spirit.
Right now you are not aggressive or confrontational when playing with others (although that may change).
If you see something you think is neat you say "hi" to it (i.e. trucks)
You're deeply in love with diggers trucks anything with lots of horsepower!
You think your Papa drives every truck and digger in CT.
You know where every digger/crane/bulldozer is located in town.
You lace your tiny little fingers together to pray with us every night and can say Jesus and Amen.
You like to read your bible nightly and try to manipulate Mama into spending morning time by asking to read more of the bible. It's working.

You are going through a Mama phase since you had the tummy bug (and are still recovering from it).

Every day is better than the last. You are the greatest gift God could ever have given me.
Love, Mama